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At 26 I was surviving, at 31 he was prospering.We went to a baseball game, he beat me (pretty handily) at tennis and wehad been to a bar once or twice when he invited me to dinner oneevening. We went to Cajun, a great restaurant in the West Village andnot far from his apartment. During desert he leaned over and suggestedthat maybe we could go to his apartment and seeing that it was ratherlate I could stay the night.I realize now that I was slow on the uptake because finally he gave achuckle and said, "Terry I am making a pass at you."It seemed as though time stopped for a second. I was stunned and finallysaid, "Robert are you gay?"Then we started laughing. It was a mixture of nervous laughter andrelease that ended up with full blown guffaws as we realized the lack ofcommunication that had occurred. Robert apologized many times, and Isaid it wasn't necessary and we did go up to his apartment. Unlike mylittle studio Robert had a nice one bedroom apartment with a doorman andan elevator.. I never felt any remorse for the people I had killed over the past five years. In fact I enjoyed seeing the pain and suffering in people. It’s just my thing. The main reason most say I’m a cruel person was because I had never slept with a woman; and it was true. It wasn’t why I was cruel though it was because my parents were cruel to me first. I know, cliche "my mommy and daddy were mean to me so now I'm mean to others."But my mother was a heartless wench who I had caught sleeping around with strange men. My father was a drunken bastard who constantly hit me and called me really mean names. I never forgave either of them for that and that was the true reason why I left. Now all I did was kill people for money. Today however, I had no work. I was walking in some woods with rain pouring down on me. My long black hair was soaked and stuck to my face. I was wearing a red tunic and black pants. I felt like I was drenched in a pool of ice as I slowly trudged through the soft muddy grass. I.
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